THELONGESTSTORY

loving you is complicated
like a puzzle so hard to fix
unaware what your actions mean
boy its make me mad like crap
afterall you've done
your sin is forgiven 
and i hope you are awake
lets leave the past behind
and walk on the new path
for the promises we made
not knowing whether it will be kept
my heart tells me i must risk
or nothing will be better
regardless the signs right now
we need time to heal and grow
which will make us think
after all this it is still worthwhile
hold me close and don’t let go
your love is all I want to know

its a new yearr........
roadshow just ended and i felt a huge sense of relieve
thanks to all that help me out especially my sister madj and tiffanie
i know sometimes i just flare but i really wanna apologise
these days my moodswings are really bad
im sorry
tomorrow is a new day and my stress level is gonna increase a whole lot

im losing faith in everything
i think its crazy sometimes i think im crazy
i should be like what j said
but it is hard for me
im trying hard
i think ill get sick of it but base on the past
i think i wont but maybe lessen
i gave my all its ok if i get nothing so be it
nothing can be force
those sickening ppl,  perhaps it is just retribution..
nonono its karma. i believe in karma so dont do things that you dont want it to happen to you
from now on, im gonna be sin-less
like real ~ haha but im gonna try


thailand trip on april woohoo

i love that song, his voice and emotions make me feel overwhelmed.
this is the slackest point of time in my life, im jobless. im looking, but i dont know what suits my situation now. maybe nothing at all, but i dont want to be over relying. my plans for my birthday are cancelled, it isnt important anyway.
im losing touch from the outside world again, it feels okay cause everything are smooth.
i've already made plans for next year, thanks to the limitless time i have at home. i need to strive my goal in three years time, which is the age of 22. im still so young and there is so much more for me to learn, im searching all the possibilities that can help me in my goals. no procrastinating anymore. my next year plans are fixed.

now i feel like im giving up on everything in my life,
like really everything.
my mood is very bad. like fucking bad

my health seems to be deteriorate as every day passes. i dont know why but i felt so.
everything seems so perfect, but being too perfect scares me too.
how can i ever imagine how bad if an arguement occur?
i can say that its the first time i felt special. i dont care what others say, cause its my life.
i feel happy.
that the most important.